A Half Pound

I've posted that probably the biggest challenge through this stage of my therapy regimens is keeping my weight up. For the last two weeks, I've watched my weight drop -- a pound one day, a half pound another, two pounds on yet another day.

Part of the problem has been that Deb and I were looking at the PEG food tube as an ancillary source of nourishment. (We were often told: "The food tube is there in case you need it." And we probably took that statement too literally.) And taking food orally was difficult and quite painful because of the ulcer under my tongue -- and the fact that I had zero appetite.

(It's been a funny situation, that. My sense of smell is quite good lately, and the aroma of fresh popcorn or my neighbor's steaks sizzlilng on his grill has been most pleasant. I love to smell these things, I just don't care to eat them.)

So over the last three days, Deb and I have changed our focus totally on nourishment. It's now all about the PEG tube. I'm supposed to take six cans of this carefully balanced nutritional mix per day, at a half-can per "feeding," at 45-minute (or more) intervals. And it's taken a couple of days to work out the best, fastest to do this dependably.

And as of yesterday, I think we've finally hit our stride. We finally got all twelve feedings in, starting at 6:30 AM and winding up at 8:30 PM.

This morning, with no small feeling of trepidation, I stepped on the scale. Yesterday's weight was 166. This morning, it was 166.5. My first weight increase since June.

It's only a half pound. And goodness knows that may be water weight or something else. But for me, this morning, it's a sign of hope.

Deb and I are facing down challenges one after the other. Each one seems daunting, but we face them together, with a clear vision of life after all this is over. And we move forward.

Somewhere there's pizza with my name on it.